Junina Part 2

Festa Junina

Michael jackson-Music And Me (video)

My Favorite

My 100th Post!

Just 2 words: Michael Jackson

De Novo Eles

Eu fiquei doente com alguma infecção intestinal e saia tudo por todos os lados. Não queria colocar essa imagem na cabeça de vcs, mas era importante para a história. Para tirar essa imagem meio blaaa, basta começar a cantar uma música do High School Musical (para os mais velhos, Roberto Carlos faz o mesmo efeito) que some e vc vai cantar essa música provavelmente pelo resto do dia. Bem, minha filha de 4 pergunta:
-Mãe, vc continua com "disarreia"?
-Não, já melhorei. E meu filho de 6:
-Mãe, né que (sempre começa com né que) ela falou errado? É com "z" e ela falou com "s". É "diZarreia", né?
-Well...

Idade

Meu querido filho de 6 anos:
-Mãe vc era viva na época que tinha querra com espada, tipo "na" Roma?
Ou ele não tem idéia nehuma sobre tempo ou estou com a aparência meio velha... ou cansada...

Meninas

Minha filha de 4 anos vira e diz:
- Mãe, sabia que eu vivo triste.
- É, por que?
- As vezes eu fico feliz também.
- Que bom. Por que?
- Porque sim. Não é que porque sim não é resposta? E nem porque não?
- É Eu respondo.
E acabou o assunto.

Enchente com Gente

Olha que cabeleleiro macho!

A Real Shame!

Look what's happening to the waters of the smaller rivers that flow into the Amazon and Negro Rivers:




This was taken a week ago. I went by today and it's even worse. It looks like an open toilet. Just imagine the smell! Nature is the Amazon's tourist attraction, the government needs to start doing something to clean things up fast. Don't think anyone wants to come visit a place that looks like a broken public bathroom. Very sad...

11

If possible never let them sit too close to each other.
All kids who live in the same house should have restraining orders. Look at the definition I googled:

"What is a restraining order?
A restraining order is an order made by a court to protect a person from physical pain or injury or the threat of pain or injury. It can generally be issued against a family member (for example, husband, ex-husband, father of your child) or a household member (anyone with whom you live or used to live) or against someone you have recently dated. You do not have to be married to the person to get a restraining order. However, you must know where the person lives or works. A list of the people against whom restraining orders can be issued is on the restraining order form."

Don't brothers and sisters, when they are children, hurt and bother each other? So, a restraining order would be perfect.

Bugs

My husband is traveling and a humongous roach, of course, appeared in the house. Almost went to neighbors saying I needed a man but then thought it wouldn't sound right. My oldest son was able to scare it away but not kill it. Will have trouble sleeping tonight.

Tooth Fairy

My 6-year-old lost his second tooth and put it under his pillow for the tooth fairy to take and leave him some money. Guess what! The tooth fairy forgot!!
My son woke up the next morning and brought the tooth for me to see and said: "Look mom, the tooth fairy didn't come. How come?"
I said, while at the same time thinking to myself, the tooth fairy is such an idiot, how could she: "She was probably too busy. Maybe too many people lost their teeth yesterday and she couldn't get to everbody." Said this calmly, like it was something that happened all the time, acted very knowledgeable (is that a word) about tooth fairy culture and traditions. Continued: "Why don't you try again tonight and see what happens. She'll probably come."
Luckily, the tooth fairy was a little more responsible the second night and she did her job. But I think my son is beginning to have some doubts about fairies. When he found the coin the next morning he looked at me and said: "You did this."
I denied it of course.

Rainforest Raindrops

"raindrops keep falling on my head..."

A New Guest

I went to help my son ride his bike around the neighborhood and this is who we met. He or maybe she seemed to be eyeing us somewhat suspiciously but he/she let us get close enough to take the pictures. If we got too close, he would nod his head which in lizard language I guess means okay that's close enough or any closer and I'll wack you with my tail. He was just the right size for us to maintain our distance.

It's the Little Things that Matter

Good Morning

Saying g'morning to my husband.

Karaoke

Google is advertising a Karaoke machine on my blog! They must be kidding.
(Or they just wanna teach me how to spell Karaoke). Refer to Dark Thoughts.

Number 10

Never take car trips that last more than 2 hours without one of the following objects:
a portable DVD player
a gameboy or something of the sort
valium

Seven and Eight and Nine

When you receive a gift, even if you hate it, always say you love it and think it's beautiful because they will let the person who gave it to you know exactly what you thought.

Don't let them watch you get a bikini wax. If you do, the first stranger they meet will be informed on how it went.

Never tell them you're going to give them a surprise in a few days or even a few hours. If you plan on giving them a surprise just say: "Look! I have a surprise for you!" and give it to them immediately, unless you like saying: "You'll have to wait and see." every 5 minutes for as long as it takes to give them the surprise.

Numbers 3, 4 and 5, 6

3. Have backup of everything you ever have on your computer.
4. Do not let your girls wear long dresses or skirts to go to the mall and then let them go up the escalator without holding the skirts up.
5. Never ever let them go play at a friend's house after they have just overheard you talking bad about this friend's mother.
6. Do not tell them your Facebook, Orkut, Twitter or whatever passwords. All kids today are born computer literate.

Number 2

Do not allow them to talk in elevators PERIOD! If you do and there are overweight people with you in the elevator, this will always be the topic they choose to discuss.

1000

Photo by The Domestic Diva - flickr

Have you noticed all the 1000 books and TV shows around nowadays?
1000 plces to visit, things to eat, books to read etc before you die?
Well, I've decided to write: 1000 things NOT to do with kids or you might wanna die.

Here's Number One:

Do not say your kids can have fun painting in the kitchen and then just go watch TV.

New Day

Feel much better today. Do not want to eliminate the neighbors anymore. Still wish their karaoke machine would break though. Back to my Dr. Jekyll self again. Hope to stay this way for a loooooooooooooong time.

Dark Thoughts

I always thought criminals were a totally different breed of people. Whatever leads them to commit their crimes is something us ordinary folks just don't have. But after yesterday, I believe I may have what it takes to assassinate someone. I woke up with a headache and thought it would eventually go away. What was a discomfort at first, soon turned into a splitting migraine. I took a pill and tried to sleep it off. My 6 year old interrupted my frustrated nap 3 times so I gave that up, got up and after taking another pill, sat and waited. That's when it happened. Our nextdoor neighbors decided to sing karioke. (I do not know how to spell it and do not want to learn) My migraine had gotten to the point where I didn't know if my brain was going to explode my skull or if it had shrunk to the size of a pea and had rolled down to my stomach and was making me sick. I think it might have been the latter because when I tried to turn my head it felt hallow inside. The singing started and wouldn't stop, not even between songs. The performances were the type Simon, from American Idol, would have commented: "Dreadful. One of the worst performances of my life. Go back to your day job f o r e v e r!" But Simon wasn't here to send them crying out of the room so I started to imagine how I would kill them if I could. The music was too low and there were 2 microphones, which of course were too high, so all we could hear was their voices with no music. What was worse was that I knew all the songs, so there was no way I could not follow along. Even a century-old-extremely-experinced-in-meditation-buddhist monk couldn't have blocked out the singing. I also started praying, not that my headache would go away, but that we'd have one of those Amazon thunder storms and that lightning would hit their kareoke machine and electrocute each and everyone of them. That, unfortunately didn't happen nor did they stop singing. Later, my husband got home and offered to take me to the hospital, afraid that some brain tumor might have altered my usually happy and light personality(well, maybe those aren't the right words to describe me)into some Mr. Hyde creature. I lied telling him everything was just fine. Then, waited a little longer while thinking that throwing the firecrackers we had bought the day before into their backyard might get my whole family in trouble. So, I then decided to take the kids to a party they had been waiting the whole day to go to. My brain had gone into the jelly stage and I was scared it might start leaking out my ears. I put the kids into the car and told them to only whisper the rest of the evening or monsters would hear them and come take them away and eat them. We made it through the night. Today, I feel like I have a really bad hangover. I believe the only difference between me and Charles Manson is that he had no reason to do what he did. I, on the other hand, would have a good motive. I'm sure the police would understand.

Festa Junina Part 2

Festa Junina

Teve de tudo, desde grupos de xote, índios com fogo até street dance da terceira idade. Claro que as crianças se acabaram.

Solitude - by A. A. Milne

I have a house where I go
When there's too many people,
I have a house where I go
Where no one can be;
I have a house where I go,
Where nobody ever says "No";
Where no one says anything-so
There is no one but me.

O Mundo é Pouco

Perguntei ao meu filho de 6 anos o que ele costuma pensar, o que passa pela cabeça dele. Ele respondeu: Eu penso em conguistar o mundo!